Keeping the Stereotype Flag Flying

Hey, hey, calm down, calm down says the young man in a shell suit and dodgy perm as he walks off down the street.

Obviously from Liverpool then, you say to yourself, but one key ingredient is missing - the stealing. Well, rest easy, as it turns out that such was the desperate need for some fans to get tickets to the upcoming FA Cup Final, they robbed Postman Pat's little red van, and emptied it of all the tickets. Authorities cancelled the tickets of course (allegedly, as that process must involve some semblance of organisation over and above getting a stadium ready within a 6 year timeframe, so don't hold your breath).

And Merseyside police have warned that Cup final tickets pilfered from a Royal Mail delivery van in Liverpool last Friday are worthless. "Fans are advised [that] tickets stolen on May 5 from the van have been cancelled and will not be accepted for the game," sniffed a spokesman for the bizzies.